6 Common Vow Renewal Guest Etiquette Questions, Answered

Planning a vow renewal ceremony involves many details, and one of the most important is making sure your guests feel comfortable and informed. While you’ve probably hosted many events before, the guest etiquette for a vow renewal has its own nuances. Whether it’s deciding on attire, addressing dietary needs, or managing the guest experience, we’ve got answers to some of the most common vow renewal etiquette questions.

1. How Can We Make Our Destination Vow Renewal More Affordable for Guests?

Hosting a destination vow renewal can be magical, but the cost of travel may discourage some guests from attending. Here are ways to make it more affordable for them:

• Choose Off-Season Dates: Selecting a date during the off-season or shoulder season can drastically reduce travel costs for guests.
• Early Booking Information: Provide your guests with travel and accommodation details as early as possible, allowing them to take advantage of lower prices.
• Suggest Affordable Alternatives: If your venue is at a high-end resort, consider offering a list of nearby, more budget-friendly hotels. You could also research and recommend Airbnb options for group stays.
• Coordinate Group Discounts: See if you can negotiate discounted rates for guests at the hotel or venue.
• Room-Sharing & Carpools: Help guests coordinate room-sharing arrangements or carpools to reduce costs.
• Transportation Coverage: If possible, offer transportation from the airport to the venue or between ceremony and reception sites.

Pro Tip: Consider hosting a group activity that’s low-cost, like a beach picnic or a guided walking tour, to make the trip more enjoyable for everyone.

2. How Can We Keep a Formal Vow Renewal While Avoiding Scaring Off Guests with a Black-Tie Dress Code?

If you’ve been dreaming of a formal vow renewal, you can achieve the elegant atmosphere you want without putting too much pressure on guests.

• Black Tie Optional: Opt for a “black tie optional” dress code. This lets guests know they can wear a formal gown or tuxedo if they wish, but a dark suit or cocktail dress is also acceptable.
• Offer Style Suggestions: Include dress code recommendations on your invitation or website. Phrases like “elegant evening attire” or “formal yet comfortable” can help clarify the tone without sounding too strict.

Pro Tip: You could also include a note like, “We want you to feel comfortable while looking your best,” to make guests feel more at ease.

3. How Do We Kindly Request Guests Not to Take Pictures During the Ceremony?

These days, there’s always someone eager to snap photos or videos on their phone, but if you’d prefer an “unplugged” ceremony, here’s how to make your wishes clear:

• Post a Sign: Place a tasteful sign at the entrance of your ceremony space with a message like, “We kindly request an unplugged ceremony—please turn off all phones and cameras.”
• Print the Request: Add a note to your ceremony programs asking guests to refrain from taking pictures or videos.
• Ask the Officiant: Before the ceremony begins, have your officiant gently remind guests that you’ve requested no photography during the event.

Pro Tip: Reassure guests that there will be plenty of professional photos shared after the event, so they can sit back, relax, and enjoy the moment.

4. We Don’t Drink Alcohol. Should We Serve Alcohol for Our Guests?

It’s completely up to you whether or not you serve alcohol at your vow renewal. Here are a few options:

• Go Alcohol-Free: If you prefer not to have alcohol, consider fun alternatives like a lemonade stand, a gourmet coffee bar, or a custom soda station. Mocktails are another great way to keep the celebration festive.
• Offer a Limited Bar: If you’re open to serving alcohol but don’t want to host a full bar, consider offering just a few selections, like beer and wine. This will keep things simple and manageable.

Pro Tip: If you choose to skip the alcohol, make sure your alternative drink options are fun, unique, and reflect your personality as a couple.

5. How Can We Accommodate Guests with Dietary Restrictions or Preferences?

With the variety of diets today—vegan, gluten-free, keto, and more—it’s natural to wonder how best to accommodate your guests’ dietary needs. Here’s how:

• Work with Your Caterer: Collaborate with your caterer to ensure you’re offering options for common dietary restrictions, like gluten-free or vegan dishes.
• Clear Labeling: If you’re having a buffet, clearly label each dish with indicators like “gluten-free,” “vegan,” or “contains nuts” to help guests easily find what’s suitable for them.
• Ingredient Transparency: If you have a vow renewal website, include a section with the menu, listing key ingredients for each dish. This helps guests plan ahead and ensures everyone has something they can enjoy.
• Offer a Vegan or Vegetarian Entrée: Even if most guests aren’t vegan or vegetarian, having at least one plant-based option available is a considerate gesture.

Pro Tip: Focus on accommodating severe allergies (like gluten or peanuts), as those guests will need extra attention. Others with less critical restrictions will often know to navigate on their own.

6. Is It Rude to Have a Vegetarian-Only Menu for Our Vow Renewal?

Your vow renewal is a reflection of who you are as a couple, so don’t be afraid to plan a menu that fits your lifestyle. If you’re vegetarian, it’s perfectly acceptable to serve only vegetarian options.

• Introduce Variety: Provide a variety of vegetarian dishes to ensure there’s something for everyone. Consider including popular vegetarian proteins like tofu, tempeh, or plant-based meats that even non-vegetarians can enjoy.
• Make It Special: Use high-quality ingredients and create a menu that will excite all guests. Dishes like roasted vegetable tart, mushroom risotto, and plant-based sliders can be a hit with vegetarians and non-vegetarians alike.

Pro Tip: If you do want to offer a meat option but prefer a mostly vegetarian menu, consider offering one dish with meat or fish while keeping the majority of the menu plant-based.