25 Tips for Couples Planning Their Own Vow Renewal

The Ultimate DIY Vow Renewal Planning Checklist

Planning your vow renewal on your own can feel a little overwhelming at times, but it is possible to do it on your own without losing your mind. Perhaps you want to keep the budget small, simply love the DIY possibilities, or really want to be in control of all fo the details. Whatever your reason is for doing all of the planning yourselves, being organized is the key to keeping everything on track.

The key first step in being your own planner is to make sure you have plenty of time for it. The longer your planning timeline, the better. A full year is ideal if you’re working while planning or want popular vendors or venues.

You might be fortunate and have friends and family that are happy to help, but the chances are good that most of your planning and DIY project duties will need to be done by the two of you. (Don’t expect people to be as excited about helping with your vow renewal as they were with your wedding. It’s just not the same.)

Deciding on how much you want to spend on your vow renewal is the first thing the two of you need to figure out before any real planning can start. While it’s true that you can plan a vow renewal for a couple of hundred dollars, you should be prepared for a reality check. Many couples get started planning without having realistic ideas about current costs. Deciding on what’s truly important to you is essential to planning a fantastic vow renewal on almost any budget.

Once the money issue has been decided upon, you can move on to finding inspiration for your celebration and working on firming up the details. This is the fun part! Pour over page after page of inspiration to get an idea of what style of vow renewal you want. Also, reflect on any vow renewals or weddings you’ve recently attended. Was there anything you loved or would do differently? It’s vital that the two of you are actively involved in making the style and theme decisions together as your vow renewal should be a representation of you as a couple.

Being well organized is critical when planning your vow renewal yourselves. There are so many details to manage that you’ll need a way to keep track of everything. It doesn’t matter whether you opt for an event planning app or a simple spreadsheet; just figure out what works for you and use it.

Most importantly, remember why you’re having this celebration in the first place, celebrating the love the two of you share. When planning becomes crazy, and things aren’t going perfectly, relax, and have faith that everything will work out and come together just like it has time and again over the years you’ve been married. This should be a fun and romantic experience, so let the tiny details go and focus on what’s truly important: the two of you.

Here are some of our top tips for planning an unforgettable vow renewal.

1. Do Your Planning Together

Planning a vow renewal should be something you do together. Not only will it help keep each of your task lists manageable, but the celebration you create will truly reflect who the two of you are as a couple. Even if one of you can only be involved in making decisions about key elements, while the other manages all the details, planning it together is essential.

2. Set a Firm Budget

Take an honest look at your finances and decide how much you can comfortably afford to spend on your vow renewal. There’s no sense in creating relationship stress over finances, given that the celebration is all about your enduring love, so you don’t want to plan to spend more than you really can afford. No matter the size of your budget, you can create a meaningful vow renewal.

You will need to sit down and have this discussion right away as it will be the determining factor in many of your other vow renewal decisions. Once you have agreed upon a budget, stick to it! It’s easy to get carried away when faced with endless fabulous options, but stop and remind yourself why you’re renewing your vows to get grounded again. (Hot tip: Leave yourself a 10 percent cushion to cover unexpected costs that will inevitably come up.)

3. Create a List of Vow Renewal Priorities

Sit down together and decide what the three most important elements of your vow renewal are. These should be things that you don’t want to compromise on above all others. Common priorities include using a particular photographer or caterer, having a live band, holding it on a specific date, and traveling to a specific destination. You should be willing to compromise on everything else to ensure that you can have these three elements. Agreeing upon these priorities will not only help you stay within your budget but help you make other key decisions.

4. Determine the Style

You’ll need to decide upon what type of look and feel you want for your vow renewal. Formal or casual? Or something in between? Modern, classic, or minimalist? The options may feel endless with so many sources of inspiration at your fingertips. The important thing is to pick a style that feels comfortable for both of you. Browse a few resources together, such as Pinterest, Instagram, and of course, this one! Put your ideas together on a Pinterest board or two of your own or print them out and put them up on a sheet of poster board to help organize and refine your vision.

5. Think About Dates (and Seasons)

You’re free to hold your vow renewal on any day of the year you like, not just your anniversary date. Perhaps you got married in winter and have been dreaming of a spring garden vow renewal. Or maybe you want to combine your vow renewal with a fabulous New Year’s Eve party. Pick a few dates that might work and try to stay flexible. Finding the perfect match of venue, caterer, officiant, baker, and florist that are available on the same day can be challenging!

6. Select a Theme

Your theme is simply the concept in which you will design your vow renewal around. It can be an actual theme (like flower power, art deco, or bohemian rhapsody), a specific style, a particular color scheme, or seasonal inspiration. Making decor, attire, venue, and other decisions is generally easier when you’re working from a concept. Plus, it helps you create a more cohesive look.

7. Stop Looking at Ideas

Once you’ve determined your style and selected your theme, stop looking at all those sources of inspiration. Not only are they distracting, but they can also cause you budget headaches should you decide to switch themes or make expensive additions to your plan. Staying focused on the ideas you started with is critical to making your planning process go smoothly.

8. Get Organized

Being organized is essential for DIY planning success. You can use checklists, apps, spreadsheets, a notebook, or anything that helps you keep your budget, to-dos, vendors, appointments, and other details in one easy to manage place.

9. Create a Master To-Do Checklist

There are tons of planning checklist examples available online for planning vow renewals and other events to guide you in developing yours. Typically master checklists contain to-dos broken down by months, weeks, and days leading up to your vow renewal. Most of these will need to be customized for your particular situation.

10. Choose Attendants Carefully (if at all)

Attendants are entirely optional for vow renewals. You can invite your original wedding party, only your best man and maid of honor, your children, or new friends to be your attendants. Just don’t go overboard with the total number; it’s best to limit your attendants to one or two on each side. Keep in mind that vow renewal attendants typically don’t assist with planning activities, they just take part in your ceremony and celebration. Also, if you’re asking them to wear something special or travel, you should be prepared to pay for the associated costs.

Talk with your spouse about if you want to have attendants or not. If so, decide on how many and whom. Keep in mind the expenses that come along with having attendants.

11. Create Your Guest List

Sit down with your spouse and make a list of all the friends and family that you want to have present as you renew your commitment to one another. You’ll also need to decide if you’re going to include children or not and how many plus one’s you need to accommodate. Depending on the size of your budget and the venue you have in mind, you may need to refine your list. Since this is a very personal occasion, don’t feel like you need to invite people you work with, closeby neighbors, or people who live far away unless you have a very close relationship with them.

12. Research Venue Options

Venues come in a lot of price ranges and differ significantly in what’s included in the package within any given price range. You need to do your research! You’ll want to collect details on packages, restrictions (including minimum budget spend), and prices from at least 3-5 different potential venues. Once you have them narrowed down, make sure to visit in person on the same day of the week around the same time of day that you’re wanting to hold your vow renewal. Once you have a price negotiated, make sure everything that was mentioned as being included verbally is written in the contract before you sign on the dotted line.

13. Consider Having Your Ceremony and Reception at One Location

Holding your ceremony at the same hotel or restaurant can help you control costs and streamline the planning process. Compare cost quotes for adding your ceremony on to your reception package to those for using another venue. A second venue will likely require additional rentals and coordination help.

14. Make Vendor Decisions Thoughtfully

Meet with a few of each type of key vendors, such as photographers and florists, before making any decisions. You’ll want to be sure they clearly understand and share your vision and can work within your budget. Don’t just go with the first ones you meet! The second, third, or even fifth one might be just what you’re looking for and offer you an even better price.

15. Only Book Vendors You Feel Good About

The quality of your vendors can be the difference between a wonderful vow renewal and a frustrating one. You want to be sure you’re working with a team of vendors that make you feel confident. Not only should they share your vision, but they should also make you feel like you can trust them to execute it as expected. These people are primarily responsible for ensuring your day runs smoothly and is positively memorable. If anything about a vendor leaves you feeling unsure or uneasy, keep looking.

16. Make Sure Both of You Read Every Contract

This is critical! Contracts are not only legally binding, but they are notoriously full of errors and clauses containing details that may make you rethink your selection of a vendor. Before the two of you sign on any dotted lines, be sure to review every aspect of each contract carefully. Check to make sure the date, time, location, agreed-upon deposits, other fees, inclusions, and other details are all included and correct. Take time to read through every contract clause, including payment and cancellation policies. If you have questions or need corrections, get those addressed before signing anything. Do not let anyone rush you into signing without both of you having completed this!

17. Recruit Help

Frequently, family and friends would love to help you plan your vow renewal but aren’t sure how to volunteer or the best way they can be helpful. Don’t feel bad about taking advantage of their offers to help. Having a team of supporters can make DIY projects a breeze and ensure that your vow renewal celebration goes smoothly.

18. Consider a Day-Of Coordinator

Having someone to manage the vendors and schedule on the day of your vow renewal can make the difference between a tiring day and an exhilarating one. Hiring a professional also gives you someone who can handle last-minute details and on-site tasks while you’re getting ready and enjoying your day. Consider it money well-spent on maintaining your sanity!

19. Select DIY Projects Carefully

While DIY décor elements can be cost-effective and add unique personal touches to your vow renewal, they can also be incredibly time-intensive. Select your DIY projects strategically. Look for high impact, cost-effective, quick, and easy projects that can be done well in advance to do. Skip anything that needs to be done last minute. Printables such as invitations, table numbers, menus, and favor labels are all great projects to DIY. Non-perishable favors and artificial flowers can also be great DIY projects. Fresh florals and food are generally best left to vendors.

20. Decide on a Social Media Strategy

It might sound a little crazy to think you need a social media strategy for your vow renewal, but it can be a big issue for even the smallest vow renewals. You’ll need to decide whether or not you want your guests to share moments of your vow renewal with the world. If you’re all for your vow renewal being blasted out to the world, creating your own hashtags and having a photo booth are great ways to get guests posting on social. On the other hand, if you want an intimate, private ceremony and don’t want your guests taking photos or videos during the ceremony, you’ll want to post a sign with your request at the entrance of your ceremony space and ask your officiant to make a quick announcement before the ceremony begins.

21. Finalize Setup and Vendor Details

As the date of your vow renewal nears, you’ll want to check with your venue to get details on the setup window for your vendors. Ideally, you want to have the venue for the whole day or at least have a window of several hours. In some cases, this won’t be possible since venues often have multiple events going on the same day. Once you have the details, contact all of your vendors to let them know so they can plan accordingly.

22. Create a Comprehensive Schedule of Events

The trick to making sure the day’s events run smoothly is to create and distribute a comprehensive schedule of everything that is to occur on the day of your vow renewal. Include details such as when you are scheduled to be at hair and makeup appointments, when vendors are to arrive, timing for transportation to pick you up and the time you are to arrive at the ceremony location, time the ceremony is to start, when the photographer will take photos of the two of you, the time you will arrive at the reception venue, when any toasts and dances are to occur, when dinner will be served, when the cake will be cut/dessert is to be served, time the last dance should occur, etc. Get every last detail down and then print copies for everyone and/or email them to your venue, officiant, photographer, attendants, key family members, all vendors, MC, and anyone else that needs to know. This will ensure everyone is on the same page about timing and location(s) and that any issues get resolved before the day of your vow renewal.

23. Thank Your Helpers

Take time to thank everyone who helped you with the planning, is an attendant, or will be helping at your vow renewal. A small gift of thanks and your gratitude will go a long way in making sure everyone feels appreciated and will be there to help make sure you day goes smoothly.

24. Focus on the Big Picture

First, accept that something goes wrong at every event. Typically, only the hosts know that something isn’t perfect. Relax and let go of worrying about minor issues. It’s your special day and you should focus on being present in the moment. It’s not every day that you get to celebrate your love for one another and the strength of your marriage in this way.

25. Relax and Have Fun

Guests tend to have as good of a time as their hosts are. So relax, and have the time of your lives! You’ve worked hard to get to this day, and it’s yours to enjoy. Take the last-minute details in stride or, better yet, delegate them. This should be a day filled with romantic moments between the two of you and special moments with friends and loved ones.